This isn’t the first whacked-out recipe to be birthed from a couple of healthy, cool ingredients. Bloggers and big shots alike (we’re looking at you, Martha Stewart) seem to be racing to see who can combine the most trendy foodstuffs into a single bite. And some—despite their groan-worthy names—actually may not make you gag. Others? Well, you be the judge. Kale Salad with Spelt and Chia Vinaigrette Leafy green du jour? Check. Low-gluten ancient grain? Check. Tiny omega-3 packed seed that makes an ordinary salad dressing feel at home in a yoga studio café? Check again. It’s a lotta hip packed into one salad bowl, sure. But we wouldn’t be loath to eat it for lunch, either. Deep Fried Beets with Sriracha Mayo If they’d only called them “crispy,” these beets could have found a home on the snack menu of any farm-to-table restaurant worth its weight in flaky sea salt. Cheesecake Greek Yogurt and Quinoa Parfaits (in a Mason jar) “I’m craving a slice of creamy, New York-style cheesecake, so I think I’ll mix up some Greek yogurt and quinoa” …said no one ever. (But at least the Mason jar makes it look cute + easy to toss into your gym bag for a post-SoulCycle treat.) Gluten-Free Matcha Protein Bars What’s better than lots of protein? Lots of protein in the form of a gluten-free bar that’s packed with green tea, sweetened with Stevia, and drizzled with antioxidant-rich dark chocolate. For maximum effect, consider pairing with a bottle of kombucha, your choice of vintage. MORE: From Truckers to Hipsters: When Did Jerky Become a Superfood? Beet Granola This just seems entirely unappetizing. And unnecessary. Kimchi Deviled Eggs Admittedly, these look very good. But they also evoke the image of a weary food editor wracking her brain over how to make an already-very-2014 gastropub bite even more Right Now by folding some spicy fermented cabbage into the mix. Because we all need to keep our microbiomes happily fed, right? Breakfast Chickpea Cookie Dough Why bother with going through the effort of making fully cooked breakfast cookies when you can just eat breakfast cookie dough made from whipped chickpeas? So much simpler. Savory Oat Groats and Kale After seeking culinary inspiration via a weekend blitz through all of Brooklyn’s gustatory hotspots, this is what Martha came up with. Just one question: Where’s the fried farm egg?